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Would you consider co-parenting with a close friend?

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May 26, 2019
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January 22, 2020
 

Once upon a time, there was a poet who oh so eloquently flows to the music while the words escapes him named Samson.

He posed a question in his Instagram stories and a wordist who oh so eloquently captures verbiage from what she sees in the likes of Chanel Speedy.

Due to her clicking Samson’s story it formed a script and it goes a little something like this.

 

Samson: Would you consider co-parenting with a close friend?

Chanel Speedy: Being that our generation doesn’t share the same bond our grandparents or parents may have had? Before I answer your question as I just added on another question LOL.

In this situationship and or arrangement if I may is there LOVE though? The void can not be replaced with another one. Personally, I can’t get involved with someone I am not drawn to as far as a connection. Otherwise, it is meaningless to me. It was a running joke with one of my guy friends that if we both are single by said age then we are just going to build a family like build a bear. When it was all said and done there was not a connection on that level so in reality it was literally just a joke.

This is why I don’t like answering hypotheticals because when the time comes will you sink or float? You learn how to swim in calm waters. If a shark is in your rearview are you going to remember your breathing techniques? In that moment, so many factors have entered the equation anxiety, panick and survival mode has now kicked in.

Samson: I agree with you. The love factor plays a role. I do know friends who love each other deeply; not on a relationship level but I do believe the love and feels matter. I predict friends that end up co-parenting probably end up being together because maybe the bond is special but I do believe if people are jumping into it to fill a void it won’t work. There has to be some level of love there for this to be a beautiful experience. Connection is important I guess if it’s there go for it. But if it’s not nah because as you said that’s meaningless..

 

Chanel Speedy: Love is meant to be felt in any relationship unless it is a take away in which it becomes draining because it’s one sided. To love. To be in love. To have love for someone all different forms but the bottomline is still love. Similar to Kehlani I don’t know her situation with her friend but they are happy and she is deep so that may be a deeply rooted love like none other experienced. I think it is beautiful.

To bring a child up in a realm of that forceful magnitude is amazing. That bond makes it more special. The child who you have to water is the feature presentation, the new director and chief in charge everything will revolve around this little bundle of joy. A stable environment of learning, healthy habits and stages of progression should be rewarded because the love is present. I personally do not settle as dust does. However, to each it’s own.

Some are filling voids and it shows because you are not healed from trauma in your life from what you have been subjected to. The cycle continues. Where does end though? Someone has to choose themselves over a crave, desire or temporal pleasure. The lack there of makes it meaningless. Two lost people are going to be lost. If one is found they in return can teach the other. Let’s use a map, google, read a book, go to therapy etc. Heal, be uncomfortable to love, to be and feel loved. I like this conversation and where this is going. This should be read by others just a thought. These are the type of discussions we need to be having. I appreciate your curiousity and I’m glad I had time today to click on your story.

Samson: That was very well said, I like that and I agree love is still love in all of its forms as long as it’s real and rooted from a good place that love will be beautiful but yes many are filling voids subconsciously and consciously. I feel that too, we live in a strange world but bottom line is I can definitely agree if two people decide to do this. It just can’t be for a filling or repacking of a void but for the genuine good of this little being that the two would have to raise. I appreciate you jumping in on this talk and I will for sure have some of these conversations displayed because it’s important. I appreciate you for clicking in and getting involved.

I feel that both individuals have to know themselves and live themselves first.

Chanel Speedy: Dream big and execute you always had a way with words which drew me to you. Just wanted you to know that. It’s the simple things.

Samson: Thank you means a lot for real. 🌞

Chanel Speedy: You are very welcome.

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16 Comments

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    • Thank you for taking the time to read the blog Milani! As far as centering myself thoughts and inspiration comes in waves so whenever I feel compelled to reflect on a life experience I write it. It may not make the blog for sometime but I keep mental notes to express when the time comes. Let it flow as far as your ideas I usually freestyle when writing and then go back to correct it. Sometimes stepping away helps as well to get some motivation and then continue. Happy writing!

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